Via DealBreaker’s inimitable Bess Levin, comes news that Bear Stearns is making available — for one last time — items from its company store. “This is your last chance to get a Bear Stearns hat, fleece, umbrella, duffel bag, teddy bear, etc.” the memo reads. We especially like the idea of buying a Bear Stearns duffel bag. Nothing points to your own success like a bag that symbolizes a historic failure. Which means that even if you get rooked in a game of, say, raquetball (don’t all high-powered execs these days play raquetball?), you can always look at your BSC duffel bag and feel better about yourself. Speaking of which, we can’t help but wonder if the proceeds from the sale of these soon-to-be-rare-and-collectible items won’t go to pay off some of the Federal government’s liability in the whole deal. You know, given that the taxpayers are on the hook for at least some of the mess. (T-minus roughly one week until a Bear Stearns bear shows up on eBay. We called it.)